I Don't Know What To Do

I Don't Know What To Do

Listen to me.
I'm going to be honest.
I don't want to be here.
I don't want to visit you.
I don't know what to do.
I'm an actress.
Not a teacher.
I can't force him to do his work
Any more than you can.
I'm lost.
I don't understand.
I did my homework.
I came home and got it done.
I wasn't allowed to do
Anything until it was.
I knew what I had to do
And I did it.
He has the same rules.
We've taken everything away.
I ask what he needs to do.
He says he's done.
What more can I say?
We lecture.
We yell.
We threaten.
We swear.
I don't know
How meeting like this
Is going to change anything,
Or even help in any way.
I don't want to be here.
I don't know what to do.

(December 2, 2014)

It's Poetry, Darling

It's Poetry, Darling

It's poetry, darling.
So just let it enter your soul.
Let it into your mind,
And your heart,
And reach down to your bones.
Let it pull something out of you
You didn't know was even there.
Listen
And let it tell you something new.
Let it fill your brain with ideas
So strange and divergent
You find you want to hide
And never come outside.
It's poetry, darling.
So just let it into your soul
And allow yourself to feel.

(August 19, 2014)

Bad Blood

So I heard this song, and I really like it.  But as I was listening to it, it made me think about how I would respond if someone came to me with the same request.  This is what I came up with.

Bad Blood

There is bad blood here.
No one is denying that.
There is bad blood.

You asked me to let it dry.
But friend, this isn't my claret spot.
My heart was stitched long ago.

I said my goodbyes.
And I walked away.
Relieved when it was done.

Now you want to dig up the dead?
Opening wounds long scarred over.
Like that would make things better.

No, I have not forgotten how I felt.
But I have left that anger behind me.
I will not drown for them.

So yes, there is bad blood here.
But I let it dry years ago.
Perhaps someone else should let it go.

(June 26, 2014)

Here's the song:

For You

For You

When I wake up tomorrow,
You will be gone.
I am melancholy
Because I can't follow.
We have different paths
This time.
When we meet again
I know I will have missed
Your smile.
But not realized
Just how much.
So tonight I will
Play my best for you
And I will dedicate
My last show to you.

(May 5, 2014)

Follow

Follow

I know you love me.
I know you care.
I'd follow you anywhere.
But when I asked
You to follow me,
You were angry.
Confusion swallowed my judgement.
What had I done?
I thought you were the one.
I know you are.
But when my dreams
Mean nothing to you
I don't want your love.

(May 3, 2014)

Used To Be

Used To Be

You told me

You used to be an asshole.

Your words.

Then you told me I was pretty.

You followed up with

But you would be gorgeous

If you lost 30 pounds.

You said you used to be

An asshole.

You lied.

(May 2, 2014)

Just Another

Just Another

I realize now
I hardly knew you
And there were things
I was afraid to say out loud.
Things that I held close
To my heart.
And when I finally shared
You did exactly what
I thought you would.
You were just another
Trying to set fire to my dreams.

(May 2, 2014)